It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
