I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Randomize
