It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
