My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
birth control should be required to get into college
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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