I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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