can we get nightvision for the apartment?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize