I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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