Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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