u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
