Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Randomize
