Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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