the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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