Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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