Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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