..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
