You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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