You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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