I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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