You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
