Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(269): View more from Michigan

Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina

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(250): View more from British Columbia

He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."

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(614): View more from Ohio

she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...

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(502): View more from Kentucky

i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...

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(407): View more from Florida

I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.

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(269): View more from Michigan

Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...

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(540): View more from Virginia

Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....

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