yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
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