there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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