Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize