One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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