Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
