no, he came in my armpit
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
