I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
