kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
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