Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
