You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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