By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I wear drunk well.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
