I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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