So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
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