Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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