I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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