The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
