you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
