I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize