would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
