My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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