Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
