I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
