do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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