If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
It was confusing and full of hummus
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Pooping to opera.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
