belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
ugly people sure do ruin things
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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