Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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