he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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