Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
