i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
