was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
